Living in the Light: A Redemptive Respose to Sexual Sin

Weeping With Those Who Weep

Receiving painful phone calls is never easy. I am regularly contacted by individuals – often in tears – because someone in their life has made the decision to forsake their covenant, their faith – their real hope – in order to chase an empty lie. I hear tragic stories like that of a husband with a history of pornography, caught again after a period of supposed victory or the spouse whose entire life is shattered by the revelation of affairs spanning decades or the wife whose enmeshed relationship with a girlfriend turned sexual. Although such scenarios are expected from our post-Christian culture, increasingly they are happening in the local church. Sexual sin is not something “out there,” it is reaching epidemic proportions in your church!

But here’s the rub: the Church does not handle sexuality very well, even on a good day! This wondrous gift given to God’s people is rarely talked about positively. Even among those who should revel in sex as a demonstration of God’s joy in delighting His children and in the glorious theological truths revealed by a robust, Biblical understanding of sexuality, it is surrounded by shame. In most churches, if sex is addressed at all, our teens are sternly warned, “Don’t do it until you’re married!” I have interacted with countless individuals raised in Christian homes where sexuality was never discussed. It is astounding that such a significant aspect of life – with sweeping spiritual ramifications – is so thoroughly neglected. Given the Church’s failures regarding sexuality, the revelation of sexual sin is usually not handled in a balanced and redemptive manner.

There are often two polar responses when sexual sin is disclosed. If the sin is quiet, keep it that way! Do not expose it to the light of day and keep as many people in ignorance as possible. However, if it is too late and the sin has become public knowledge, the only answer is church discipline – swift and severe. Historically, the Church has struggled with “shooting the wounded,” dealing heavy-handedly with sexual sin without a view to restoration and healing. There needs to be a redemptive solution, one that embraces the Gospel of Grace and the living Redeemer who enters into situations and relationships wracked with sin to bring reconciliation and healing. This is the work of His kingdom – “He’s come to make His blessings flow as far as the curse is found!” Do we believe Jesus is big enough to handle sexual sin? Do we invite sin-sick people to come into the light or do we encourage them to continue cowering in the shadows?

Seeking a Redemptive Solution

1 John 1:7 speaks powerfully to what is needed in the Body of Christ. Contrasting believers with those who walk in the darkness of their sin, John writes, “But if we walk in the light, as He is in the light, we have fellowship with one another, and the blood of Jesus His Son cleanses us from all sin.” This passage echoes John’s Gospel that men love the darkness and will avoid the light because their deeds are evil (John 3:19-21). Do we encourage people to come out of darkness? John makes plain that deep, meaningful fellowship in the Body of Christ – genuine intimacy – will only happen as we come into the light. Further, deliberately coming into the light has a direct connection to purging sin from our life. Steve Gallagher of Pure Life Ministries writes, “If you want to stay stuck in your sin, confess it only to God. If you want to overcome it, confess it to someone else!”